Finding our way back to each other (the portal of 2020)

the last rose of the season

We are living in a time of great severing and great healing. Healing is not possible without acknowledging what has been severed. And that is uncomfortable. The awakening and healing process is not smooth, it is not glamorous. Proper sustainable healing requires that we dive into the depths of the matter and find a way to wholeness. It requires that we resist running away and avoiding. Often it requires alchemizing. Alchemizing requires pressure, fire and often the facing of and walking through pain. To somehow be present to everything that it is unearthing without avoiding, ignoring, pretending, projecting or running away.

As a planet we have been living as though we are separate from the earth. We have built a world on top of the world. We have forgotten that we are nature. We have learned to see the world only from our separate point of view. And as a result we have separated ourselves from each other. We are running around with this agony deep within us and a yearning to return to something that we cannot quite name. Bouncing and projecting off each other, desperately trying to find our way to a place or state of being that is sustainable.

I know many of us are hurting. I don’t believe there is anyone on the planet who is not. And perhaps this is part of what it means to be human. We cannot avoid this by avoiding each other, for an ‘other’ will eventually come along and hurtle us into the same dance. Yes, some of us are more sensitive than others but we are all sensitive. We must stop using our sensitivity as a reason to separate ourselves from the world and from ‘others’. It is possible to be sensitive and sovereign at the same time.

We must find a way back to each other. And I do not believe this is possible without some kind of heartache. I know that the situation we are in globally is overwhelming and that it feels impossible to find our part to play in this time. I know that we are all on some level feeling this heartache and looking around us for the reason why. I know that when feeling this level of heartache it can feel like it is easier to avoid and focus on idealisation and the ultimate oneness of spirit. But that is not sustainable. And that is not real. We are souls having a human experience, and this is that experience. Your soul chose to come here now. And what a time it chose to come.

I believe that we are in a crucible right now, where all that has been in the unconscious is appearing in front of our eyes. And because relationships are the number one way that we grow it is coming up through them.

As we are moving through this second portal of 2020, let’s do our best to return (re-turn… to turn towards) to each other. When you find yourself in conflict with an ‘other’, can you find a way to stay sovereign but also keep your heart open to the ‘other’? Can you find a way to express yourself, to lean into the separation in a way that is respectful, open and safe for both of you? Can you find a way to return to love instead of separating yourself from the ‘other’?

Now, when I say love I do not mean some unprocessed emotion wrapped up in love. Love is not fluffy. Proper love exists on the same spectrum as heartache, grief and agony. Proper love is spirit earthed. Proper love is human and soul combined. Proper love can feel euphoric and it can also hurt. Proper love recognises the other with compassion. Proper love acknowledges the projection. Proper love is the way back to each other.